Posts tagged I am a business professional

Points to me for not ending this work email with “Also, please come see me so I can pout and scold you.”

I have been feeling super anxious and distracted at work lately, and I feel like it is affecting my work, so today I took my boss aside and was like “Here is what’s been going on, I feel like I am not on top of my game, but I can’t think of any specific examples of anything that I’ve fucked up — I just feel like I haven’t been doing well this month? Can you please let me know if you’ve noticed anything wrong with me / people have been complaining about me / there’s anything that you need me to do that I am not doing?” and he was like “Jenni, if you hadn’t said anything, I wouldn’t have even noticed. You’re good. And actually I might have you help someone else who isn’t doing so well right now.” And then my heart exploded and pink glitter and streamers and confetti fell at my feet, and I exhaled for the third time in weeks.

For the past few weeks, I have been leading the safety meetings at work, which means that every Monday morning at 8am I have to stand up in front of like 40 dudes and read a worksheet about the safety topic of the week? I’m still not good at it. My anxiety is through the roof, and I just ended today’s meeting by finishing reading the worksheet and going “Okay, The End.”

In case anyone is wondering how aggressive I am today, I just ran toward a co-worker and chased him away from my desk and down a hallway.

Me: I’m sorry, I’m still eating lunch — I feel like I have broccoli all in my teeth.
Co-Worker: You do. It’s like I’m talking to a fern.

All of the notes for the report I’m writing for work are covered in body glitter.

I am this close to slumping backwards, sliding down my chair, and sleeping under my desk.

Leaving a toothbrush and toothpaste at the office is the best business decision I have ever made.